Was Attila the Hun a plumber with a cat personality?

Latest posts | Feed | By Mark Brownlow on May 17, 2007

cat's eyeBack in the late 90s I managed a group of email newsletters for a since defunct company. Here's what we did for deliverability...

Nothing.

We assumed if you sent an email to someone it actually reached them (oh, those days of innocence!) And here are the stats we looked at after each newsletter went out...

None.

Gosh, we were good at our jobs.

Times change and every email marketing software or service now offers users heaps of data to play with. Deliverability is a hot issue. And technical developments across the Internet continue to turn business models and lifestyles on their heads.

However...

Lest we get carried away with own self-satisfied importance and achievement, I find it useful to remind ourselves how much further there is yet to go before we reach any kind of technological perfection online.

So to Exhibit 1 for your amusement. Here are some of the keywords and phrases used to find Email Marketing Reports in the last month...

  • Attila the hun

  • Slap yourself

  • How can you tell if a man is seeing another (my cynical answer: check to see if he has a pulse)

  • Destruction of Pompeii

  • I need to send some spam (ouch!)

  • What if slaves had the internet

  • Weakness English football team

  • How does bigfoot get along with man

  • Crusader crossbows

  • Dog personalities versus cat personalities

  • All about plumbing in ancient Rome

Search engine technology still has work to do.

And exhibit B...how email news alert services can still improve. Some selected headlines sent to me because they were (apparently) relevant to email marketing or related terms:

  • New Pics From 'Alien Vs. Predator 2'

  • Glad I wore slippers to the Manitoba Book Awards

  • The World's First Steam Engine Railway Journey

  • Camille Pissarro

  • Furling Genoas

  • Being Kimberly Tripp

  • May 9th is the deadine for your wolf comments!!

  • 9 lb 15 oz grandson born in San Francisco!!

  • Indorphine Part Ways with Drummer

  • Romance was in air for pandas

  • Taxi refund rejected (wow, now that's news...)

  • Israeli spends several hours with friendly Iranians

  • Vacancies at Caribbean Maritime Institute

  • Why have we appointed an Honorary Consul in Jerusalem and not Tel Aviv?

Message to all of us in the online world: Laurels are not for resting on.

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[This post brought to you by Campaigner Email Marketing]
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